You have a degree and you work where???

Yes.  I have a degree and I work at Beaches.

In case you don’t know Beaches is this huge as hell resort and I am in training to work the front desk.  No, this was never a dream of mine but it’s a job and it’s putting money in my pocket so why should I complain?  Many would see this as a set back but for those of you who know where my heart truly lies it’s just a stepping stone on the path.

How has it been so far?  TOUGH.  I have so much respect for EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN BEACHES.  My feet ache, my back is killing me and I am yawning more than I ever have.  Sleep comes fast and quick at night.  But the truth?  I actually like it.  I love learning and there is so much to learn that it helps distract me from my other worries.

My aunt used to work at Beaches and now she is the proud owner of Mama’s Gift Shop.  If you don’t want one place to be your stopping post, MOVE THE HELL ON!!!!

So this is a nice way to move into my other news (and this sorta has to do with dendoo).

Moving the hell on:  I applied for a job with a certain company and this company looked VERY promising (we’re talking about japan now folks).  They were supposed to call me in Sept to do a phone interview.  IT NEVER HAPPENED.   It’s now november and nothing.  I woke up and said to myself “Char, if you had to chase these people this whole time to do one stinkin phone interview then what happens when you start to work for them?”

So I told them I quit you.

Yes.  I quit them.  And I feel good.  I had to send an email to the head of the company (it’s a big company) to get a response at all.  Then they promised to check up on me and nothing.  nothing.  last night I got an email saying Wednesday is your lucky day.  We can interview you!!!  Please.

KISS MY DUST.

So I decided, I have on more place that I am really wanting to go Japan wise.  I’ll find out about that in December….man I wish Dec were now.  If I get rejected from it then I’m going traveling.  I’m tired of always looking to the north and west skies and wondering what else is out there.  Most of all, if you want something you have to go after it and if it doesn’t happen then you have to go after plan B (not the morning after pills though!).

So plan B would see my tiny butt on a jet plan come jan and I don’t care how cold it is.  that’s all a part of the thrill.

we’ll see what life brings.  keep pluggin, livin and smiling.  much love, dendoo!

dendoo is in need of an upgrade

I’ve been thinking about it.  It’s OCTOBER!

That means in a few days it will be offically 2 months until the new year.  Every new year I try to embark on a journey of a new year, a new me.  I have been doing some pondering….

What should my new year motivations be?

What will your new year motivations be?

I think this is a post that shall be continued as my mind continues to ponder….

To be updated…. much love, dendoo

death becomes dendoo

Well my internet hasn’t been fixed yet.  I take it back, they did fix it but then it went down again and then they fixed it and it went down again.  So it’s been about a MONTH since i’ve had proper internet service.  I’ve resorted to doing all sorts of crazy things (all legal) for internet.  Since I don’t have too many close friends I can’t go bum net from them like you would readily suggest but I decided I can’t let dendoo blog suffer anymore than it already has.  I have to push out a post if it kills me. 

Speaking of killing….

My last post that I wrote reassuring everyone that I am alive and well referred to the death of a family member.  My cousin was tragically killed in a car accident and it had me very busy as my family turned to me and my design skills to produce her funeral booklet thingy.  Let’s just say it was a pain in the devil’s rear but in the end I am glad I could do this good deed for her.  It turned out wonderfully (and I’m not just sayin that cause I made it). 

But the whole focus on death got me thinking about death.  Hence the title death becomes dendoo.

What would I like to have for my death?  I think death shouldn’t be a time to wallow in the sorrows of life but rather a time to celebrate who I am as a person.  I’m silly, I’m caring, I’m slightly mental and I’m me.  I don’t want a whole somber story going on at my funeral.  So what do I want?  Here it is, my wants, my hates, my needs for my party.  My funeral:

I would like pictures of me around the room but not ordinary pictures, I want pictures that capture meness.  I want pictures that make you remember something about me.  Perhaps there was a conversation that we had or never had; I want you to remember. 

I want my artwork shown too.  I’d like each of my family members to go through my artwork and select their favourite piece and have it blown up.  I’d like them to hang it in my mother’s house when it is finished. 

I would like the "Leela Song" to be played.  Don’t you just love that song?

I don’t want anyone singing any ghetto sipping on some hennessey songs (family horror joke), I don’t want any gospel hymns, I don’t want any long sermons…In fact I’ve written what I want the preacher to say.  He had better say it or I’ll haunt him.

Lastly and most importantly as I am hoping they will cremate me in the end I’d like my ashes to be disbursed in the direction of Japan.  It would be even cooler if someone would take my ashes to Japan and sprinkle them.

Death is something so horribly scary to some, another moment to others, it’s a passage, a journey, a mystery, and it’s something that connects each and every one of us.  I’m terrifed, excited and mystified by death.  I wake up some nights screaming that I’m dying but other nights I look up at the stars and wonder if our spirits will shine as brightly when we go and enable us to guide our loved ones.    What does death mean to you?   What do you want for your crossing over journey?  How do you approach death?  I think we are so excited by life that we hardly give death a second thought.  But in the days following my cousin’s death I’ve given life and death equal opportunites.

All I really want is for them to remember my death needs to be a celebration of whatI was, what I did and even what I wasn’t able to do. 

And no matter what remember everything is coming at you with much love, dendoo

i’m still alive

i’m still alive!
my internet has been down and there was a death in my family but i’ll be back with a rawr!! keep looking out for dendoo.

i was in an abusive relationship

* this is not in any way me poking fun at abusive relationships.  i view abuse very seriously.  you can be in a damaging relationship with yourself and if you need proof just ask me about it.  sometimes we are so quick to say he was the cause of my problems or she really did put me through a lot but there are times when we HAVE to see that the problems started within ourselves.  if you don’t like it that’s fine but it’s my truth.  much love, dendoo.

videorama & mega love

i am getting ready for my day and it hits me:  char you haven’t done a videorama post in a long time!  oh the shame, oh the agony, oh the pure pain of not having some videos to distract you at work.  i LOVE posting the vids for videorama and i had no idea what theme i wanted to go with so i just gathered some pretty cool vids.  i hope you guys enjoy and get mega distracted.  much love, dendoo!

celebrate yo ugly

i always say the best part about me is i KNOW i’m ugly. ain’t no frontin. man i know i look like a beast slash troll. i show my ugly every day. and the best part about me is when i do get a man he’ll know what my ugly hip looks like…. no false advertising. throw on a lil makeup and he wouldn’t even know what hit him. but on the real tip i enjoy this ugly.

much love in ugliness, dendoo

Cirque de forever 21!

I tweeted about F21’s new line but I HAD to do a blog post about it.  Yeah, yeah a little late but better late than never right?  RIGHT!  I am a serious lover of Forever 21 and if you open my closet you would see TONS of F21 clothing.

They make a chick like chic boo.  So when I checked out their new circus inspired line I totally freaked out in my heart, head, shoulders, knees and toes! The looks are divine, girly, sweet and AFFORDABLE. My favourite look is this adorable ensamble. I think I could be a princess in this for days.

As you know if it’s Forever 21 it’s going to be purse friendly.  This look is under $20.00!  WORD?  word.  Here are some of my favourite chicas who love F21.  I don’t know if they are boasting the Circus look but these girls always boost Forever 21.

Nubby {nubby twiglet always does it classy in red, black, and white}

Gala {gala darling is a darling and an international traveler}

pinkkkkkkkk {sexy broad pink she makes me want to curse like a sailor}

Agent {agent lover will make you love-her}

Oh, Oh.  Who is this doll in this outfit?  Wait could it be…me?  Yes!  This is me in a cute outfit with some help from Forever 21.  I’m so excited about this line and I hope you guys go and snap up some cute outfits because from what I can see it’s a limited time.  I wish I lived in America to snap me up something.  Hey…if anyone wants to send me a lil skirt or two holla at a dendoo!

Which store makes you go coo coo for cocoa puffs?   Let a chick know!  As always, much love from dendoo!

emotional journey

hey ya’ll.  so i’ve been very quiet for a few days and I was doing some mega deep thinking.  Boy that saying

ya don’t know what ya gat till it’s gone

is so true!  I didn’t know what independence was till it was gone.  Truth, reality, morals, honesty, all of that was stolen away from me by a very, very bad person.  Now I am in a custody battle and I am winning it all back.  Amen and thank you Lord.  That’s why I’ve been so quiet lately because these legal fees in my emotional department have been draining.

Getting yourself together emotionally is taxing but I can tell you it’s very rewarding.  Now I am at a point where I don’t want to go down any more emotional bumpy roads.  All I want to do is have a nice calm boring ride down the highway.  can I get an AMEN?

AMEN!

I’m not going to be blogging as frequently still but I will say I am glad I went on this great emotionally healing journey.  No I’m not completely healed but that part that was stolen from me is a part I can confidently say is on the verge of making a comeback into my life.   It doesn’t matter if you are dripped in Chanel, loaded in lace, rolling with gems, face is beaten to perfection, or if you have a J-Lo booty, if your insides are not matching the outsides then it’s awaste of time.

That’s what I’ve learned.  Now how are we going to fix it?  Simple!  with a glass of wine and some yummy choco cookies.  Holla!

Take this quick little weekend post and let it settle on your brain and in your heart.  I want you to feel inspired to shake the dead things off and grab the things you were taking for granted and put them BACK into your life.  While I sip on this Monkey Bay boo you go on and work on you.  Love, dendoo!

big

big
news
coming
soon
to the dendoo blog

in the meantime why not familiarize yourself with past posts daaaahling?  much, much love, dendoo

p.s. if you follow me on twitter you might have noticed i took a breather but never fear i will be back.  i have things to do in the real world with my other half known as charrish.  wish me luck!